Brooklyn Black Chocolate Stout and Hostess Cupcakes – Classier by the hour

I took a little break from posting over Christmas, but I’m back. To make up for my laziness, I’m classing it up with a pairing: Brooklyn’s Black Chocolate Stout with a Hostess Cupcake…

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O.G. Hostess, like all pre-Chapter 7 and whatnot.

When Hostess announced their liquidation, I was one of the idiots who, despite not having eaten a Twinkie in 10 years, lamented its demise. In fact, at one point I even proposed to my office-mates a Twinkie memoriam: At a set time each day I would read out one Twinkie ingredient until I reached the end of its imposing list of -ates, -extrins, -ames, and numbered dyes. Eventually, one of my office-mates slipped away to a vending machine and brought me back a pack of Hostess Twinkies and Cupcakes on the condition that I shut-up and agree not to undertake my proposed Twinkie ceremony. I greedily agreed.

Buuuut, what better way to honor the memory of Hostess than with a series of beer and Hostess treat pairings. So, today is Hostess Cupcakes paired with Brooklyn’s decadent Black Chocolate Stout. Next will be Achel’s Tripel with the almighty Twinkie.

The funny thing about today’s chocolatey match-up is that only one of the contenders is actually made with chocolate. Although, it’s not the one I would suspect. Surprisingly, Brooklyn Brewing doesn’t add an ounce of chocolate to this very chocolatey-tasting beer. For the Hostess Cupcake, however, cocoa proudly ranks in prominence on the ingredient list somewhere after beef fat and before acesulfame potassium.

So, let’s do this thing…

Brooklyn chocolate stout

The Black Chocolate Stout pours slightly more opaque than motor oil, and its head looks like Yoo-Hoo froth. It smells like rich dark chocolate, coffee, and a little roast. It’s almost like you’re about to tie into a chocolate dessert so flagrantly decadent that you repeatedly look over your shoulder expecting to see Wilford Brimley preparing a “diabetus” intervention. The taste is huge, chocolatey, creamy, sweet, and slightly boozy, but it isn’t overbearing (not nearly as sweet as some of Southern Tier’s Blackwater Series). And the roast and char really come out to play, giving the finish a slight bitterness and taming (otherwise it would be more cloying than a Care Bear riding a My Little Pony).

On the other hand, the cupcakes are not nearly as awesome a school lunch commodity as I remember them. My sack lunches must have really sucked if they left me pining for these. The chocolate icing is dull-looking and a little brittle. The cake is kind of dry and crumbly, and the filling is thick and beef fat-ty. It doesn’t even taste that chocolatey. I’m starting to question my entire childhood.

So, the best I can say about this pairing is that the mediocrity of the cupcake will boost your appreciation of the beauty of this beer. But Brooklyn Black Chocolate Stout doesn’t need a designated ugly friend to shine.

The Haybag (with her shot glass-sized pregnancy portion): Take the beer, leave the cupcake.


26 thoughts on “Brooklyn Black Chocolate Stout and Hostess Cupcakes – Classier by the hour

  1. I haven’t had the Brooklyn Black Chocolate Stout in quite some time, but your assessment is write on the money. Definitely not a wimpy beer! I remember the first time I had it, before the blogging and paying attention to such things as ABV. I sucked one down, then had two more beers, and remember having to go back to take a peek at the labels. The writing was fuzzy thanks to my booze infuzed vision, but I remember the magic 10% number. Yowza! Potent and highly drinkable stuff.

    Can’t tell you the last time I had anything from Hostess. We have Tastykake up here, so that’s what I usually go for, though I do have a love of the Drake’s Devil Dog which is craptastic stuff, but I recall them being a bit better before they cut out the trans-fat stuff (whatever that is).

    As usual, hilarious write up! Happy New Year!


    • You might be better suited for that! But, Wikipedia tells me that it’s an artificial sweetener. Geez, they even have to use a shortcut for sweetness. Can’t they just use more sugar or high fructose corn syrup?!

  2. I am not a fan of chocolate stout-usually to smokey and char-y for me, but I do love me a Hostess cupcake. I think you got a bad snack- I usually find them to be a little dampish which I don’t find objectionable. I think I prefer them with a lovely Belgian-or saison even. Actually, neither. Now that I think about it I don’t mix my snack cakes with my beer. The condescending look from my husband wouldn’t allow the pairing. I’d have to eat the cupcake first.

    • Perhaps it was stale. Hostess snacks might sit around for a long time in the Capitol Hill vending machines. I’m thinking next time I might go with a big, malty barleywine or a quad.

    • Young’s Double Chocolate Stout is pretty chocolatey stout, but I don’t think it’s nearly as roasty. I think it’s brewed with chocolate and has lactose in it (which is unfermentable) so it’s quite a bit sweeter than this one. Sorry, I’m usually not much help when it comes to English beers.

  3. We still have those things sitting around in Walmart (the Twinkies & Hostess cupcakes, not the stout–I wish). You must have got a really old one. According to experts at LBHQ, the fresh ones are awesome. I would trade a dozen of them for a beer.

    • You’re in luck. It appears that the Canadian company that owns the license to make Hostess confections is still in business and cranking out Twinkies by the gansy-load. Man, you Canadians get all the breaks.

  4. Pingback: Hostess Pairing Part II: Achel 8º Blonde and a Twinkie | beerbecue

  5. Pingback: Brooklyn Black Chocolate Stout | More Beer For Me

  6. Pingback: Chocolate Beer Comparison | More Beer For Me

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